like in the movies...

Swimming against the current feels sooooo good. Come on in the water in fine.

While the world seems to be overflowing with consumption, waste, grief, aggression, greed, relativism, self-absorption, bad music and advertising and awash in apathy, I am particulary pleased to be solidly planted in a stillness of calm bliss.

I have several places to extend gratitude for this... the amazing new boyfriend (who knows the brilliance of rolling things up in life), the prairies, a homeplace, and my gang of family/friends. My soul is experiencing the peace of homeplace and I am doing a better job of appreciating the small things in life. Living in a prairie "theme park" for a number of months awakened a sense of "role" that any/each of us play in our particular communities. Diversity of human personalities/characteristics is strength. Limitations (financial, spatial, temporal, etc) bring structure so that life can move forward. It is a danger that we people get lost in a false-homogeneity; in urban centres we do not have to interact with the diversity of people present in our communities, nor are we called to actively exercise tolerance of differences in our daily lives - often it's just lip service!!! And, that most people have options, options, options leaves society with little perspective, so that the immediate challenges in our days become "should I have cake... or pie for dessert?" (Ha! Pie of course!) But, I don't think that people naturally move forward and embrace growth or change becaues that takes "work". So people distract themselves with pleasantries in the present and avoid forward movement...

Ok.... Ranty....

I'm just happy, that's all. And I'm happy to be where I am. And the world is a really crazy place...

why do we do what we do?

I have been thinking about health and "doing a cleanse", so tonight I began a full body 30-day process of inviting my organs to function closer to their potential... how boring! I think that this is important, but geez, like what a navel-gazing topic! I am wondering if this is something that people to to fret and fawn over themselves, which may lead to further inward-facing obsessions?? I wonder this because I do not desire to walk that path.

Check? Check? Testing, 1, 2, 3?

On a lighter note, I made perogies according to Auntie-Ann today. They are terrific! I decided that it is not, however, a job that is to be attacked alone. It is far more entertaining and efficient to work with some one else. And Potato mashing with just a fork is something that everyone ought to try just once. Our simple technological improvements have definately changed the standard way of life.

ta.

mystery and muscle of love

I love taco time hot sauce

I read kind of slowly, but I enjoy it thoroughly
and coloured inky-wet pens are glorious

fall is by far the best season
- autumn smells like sweet fresh plants and soil, and I wear a sweater
octopus is my favourite animal, and cousin squid is cool too
- there are not enough books or articles published about them

teeth usually really creep me out.
they tend to be a sign of or a source of weakness...
creepy

turn your weakness into a strength or at least be aware of it so that you are well equipped when you are under fire.

life is designed to be a lonely experience, it is the human flaw to feel alone. Worse is the human flaw to reason and determine logically that we are alone... this is absolte crap, as there are many of humans walking around haveing the same clever thoughts you just had, and they are subtly consumed by the nagging feel ingthat they are alone. We are supposed to figure this one out, and if we are enlightened enough to figure out this weird conundrum then we will dissipate into the greater nothingness...

I wrote something else but published this more brief page..

i am on the phone with...

...a guy who sounds like he is dying. His name is Rob and he is a telephone service person for president's choice banking. His speech is slow and calm and he is very well mannered. He insists that he is ok... that's good Rob. Ok so can you help me make a balance transfer? Sure. Now I am on hold.

meanwhile... I had great customer service at Safeway this morning. That is what I like - good customer service. It is probably the key source of human to human contacts that the average North American makes these days. It is important that people respect and recognize the other person as an individual. If not I predict that the result will be a deterioration of society's ability to empathise and to value quality of life. Life will be less internalized. And that leads to people being stupid. back to the call...

Heinrich. Do you like your job? It's ok? Uncomfortable silence... THanks for choosing President's Choice Mastercard, have a nice day.... Bye.

I just finished my call and got great service. Thanks President's Choice! I feel appreciated, and not just for the money I have spent!

;)

kind of like this job

I'm sitting across from my workmate, Heather, and I was just inspired by something she said. Four months is about all that a person can handle of a dumb situation... KIND OF LIKE THIS JOB.

It is lovely and raining today. A perfectly rainy day... one in which I would choose, if I had the choice, to be lying lazily on my bed, with my feet at the head end and my head at the foot end, and I would read and doze and enjoy the perfect angle of daylight, filtering through drizzly clouds. Mmmmmm. I am going home to do that now.

I just spent 4 hours in the theatre, alone. Well, 2 visitors came in and 3 workmates stopped in. I sorted and rearranged and wrote whiteboard signs and somehow the time passed and I made money. Workday: check.

Life is rather good to me, and thanks to the sweet 8 days off from work I just had, I took time to realize this truth that I so often forget....

-S

Things are working out perfectly

Ron, Christie and I came up with our own Outdoor School version of the popular "12 Days of Christmas" carol. The song was part of a fireside performance st our winter survival trek last week. It went something like this...

On the 12th day of ODS my school boss gave to me:
Twelve great outdoor students,
Eleven cool presenters,
Ten minutes late,
Nine-day canoe trip,
Eight bumpy bus rides,
Seven great outdoor trips,
A six voice choir, (there are always always always atleast 6 students singing!)
Five Assignments Due AT ONCE!
For-gotten field books...
Three rules to survive...
Two co-op teachers...
and an intern X X-X-X-X.

It was well recieved. So was the minus 30 degree weather that we slept in... without tents. We built shelters out of deadfall and spruce boughs. It took us about 2-4 hours to build them and in the end they were pretty cosy. I used 'hot shots' continuously and wore layers of wool. Our chicken quesadillas were very tasty over the fire in the chilly weather - with super hot homemade salsa!! Yum! Getting up in the morning was a challenge, but the most difficult thing to to was to dismantle our lovely hand-built homes and scatter the pieces through the wood before departing, so as to "leave no trace". Nearly heartbreaking. My students faired well... except for one who got severe frostbite on her toes and perhaps another case or two of minor frostbite... (?) Everyone was well prepared but it is one thing to talk about what one needs to do out there and entirely different to actually use your common sense to do those things out there to take care of yourself... eeeeeee.....

I'm happy to be heading home in about 2 days.

Tomorrow is the longest night of the year... Winter Solstice. I wish you all a happy solstice, and a merry Christmas! I can hardly wait!

I would send you a cafe chesnut if I could...

Tomorrow is my dearest Ramon-y's Birthday! She is far off in an exotic land enjoying the diversity and adventure of life! Cheers to you my lovely friend! If I could bottle up a sample of the crisp Canadian winter air, with some snow, some CBC, and a cafe chestnut - I would wrap it up and tie it with a ribbon (made of me) and send it your way. I wish you all the best 'today' and in your 29th year! Happy Birthday!

peace. calm. joy.